Bus of Ridiculousness

Going to work provides the opportunity for me to experience people in a heightened state of ridiculousness.
People on public transport, enter into their special place, I don't know what it is but people just don't seem to be all there on the bus. They become totally immersed in their phones, books, hands, papers, laptops. Some just stare at the head of the person in front of them. Personally I like to keep my eye out for the eye rollers, those (mostly) middle aged woman, who just roll their eyes at everything, that guys shoes, that ladies hair, the bus stopping to pick more people up, the bus stopping to let people off, almost everything that occurs on a bus is reason to roll the eyes for these people.

Then you get the angry ones, These guys (mostly) just seem to get pissed off at everything on the bus, like pretty much everything the eye roller rolls her eyes at, this guy gets firey about.

I met a ridiculous angry bus man today on the bus. If you catch a bus from my bus stop during peak time you know there is a high possibility that you will be standing up, and you know that if possible you secure yourself a standing spot where you have two solid hands holding on...

Ridiculous angry man this morning got on the bus in front of me, we stood, me behind him and we both had good spots with the all important two hands holding on. Now old mate started fidgeting a bit, and I got amused. The all of sudden angry decides enough is enough, turns around to me, and starts swearing. Wearing headphones I didn't catch it all, but I heard a few F bombs get dropped. I'm thinking he wants to get past. I turn sideways, which of course basically means shoving your ass in the face of the person sitting down there.
Angry old mate gets past me finally and I'm thinking hes spied a seat up the back he's gunning for. But no, He just sets up behind me and keeps standing up, really?? WTF angry man, what have you just accomplished. You annoyed me, but ultimately gave me something to do this morning in writing this up, you moved from your solid standing spot on the bus to a spot where you could only hold on with one hand, and flapped around like a beached fish, banging into me and others as you did so.

Congratulations angry bus man, your ridiculousness is truly something to behold, I just hope next time its from a distance.